Three Down
One to Go by Deena McDaniel Positively Beautiful Weekly Column 2/9/20202
Parents do
have superpowers, but let’s define superpowers. I’m completely unable to see
through walls, though our children think we can because we “just know” what’s
going on all of the time. I’m totally incapable of leaping a tall building in a
single bound, however, I’ve been known to jump through a series of “hoops” to
make things happen. I’m certain my invisibility powers are still working
because it’s as though I’m not even in the room when my teenagers are engaged
on their phone with earbuds plugged in their head. The promise is they’re not gone forever, just
for a moment.
God is with
us as through those battles we have of letting them grow-up vs. keeping them at
age 7. Age 7 is the perfect age in our opinion. They’re still in love with the
fact you’re filled with the best knowledge of how to live. They love you even
more than the dog loves you. Teenagers come with joys as well. However, anxiety
has a way of overpowering the weary legs of this mom. “You, dear
children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is
greater than the one who is in the world.”-1 John 4:4 Count me in
on working the battle on my knees through prayer.
I remember
when I was 16. The world changes and our 16-year-old of today has a similar yet
different set of warrior moves. The battle does belong to the Lord. Our brain
fights the pressures of social media. Even as a grounded Christian, I’m swayed
and tempted to use comparison as I gaze at the glory of other’s lives portrayed
through the “highlight reel.” Now step back into a teenage brain. OH NO! Yes,
the smallness of what we perceive as a non-battle is a full out war in our
children's mind. And we are in an intense battle for our children's minds. “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your
adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to
devour.”- 1 Peter 5:8 Even in elementary school the kids are
subjected to too grown-up ideas. We can’t fully protect our kids from the
world, but we can arm them with the weapons to fight. “…no weapon that
is fashioned against you shall succeed, and you shall confute every tongue that
rises against you in judgment. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD
and their vindication from me, declares the LORD."-Isaiah 54:17
There will
be healing through the storms. Just like the Lord stands with open arms to
catch us when we fall, parents can be those arms of the Lord in the flesh.
Simply hug. Let them weep. Those darkest nights, we know from experience, end
when the sun rises in the East. A search for purpose is the most common battle
humans fight. The shadows of the lies of the enemy power over us as a cloud of
darkness. Then the Light!
In swoops
the “superhero” with mom powers. Put these three words into your toolbox of
weapons, “I’m so sorry.” Yes, I love you is a beautiful set of 3 words.
Suddenly, in the heat of the warfare, our kids don’t want a solution, they’re
looking for compassion. After compassion comes crying and after crying comes
credible solutions. Remind yourself the waiting isn’t the cream-filled center
of a chocolate, it’s the frustration of unwrapping the packaging. Parts of life
are just not fun. We know. They need to know we know too.
And just
like that it’s over! Yes, I’ve transitioned from that Band-aid for the scrapped
knee and the learning to ride a bike to being in the passenger’s seat teaching
her to drive. No bleeding palms, but the bleeding heart of a teenager's life is
the new gaping wound. Somehow the pain never ends, rather it transitions to a
grown-up controversy. Behind the wheel of my car, Abby the 4th kid I’ve taught
to drive is taking to the road. I glance over to her smiles of accomplishing a
hand over hand turn and see her exuberant joy of her first bike ride without
training wheels. Enthusiasm continues as she realizes the trust behind the
wheel opens opportunities. We look to you, Lord.
As much as
we love our children, God loves them more. As much as we can give good council,
God gives the better council. As much as we can comfort our kiddos, the Holy
Spirit is the greatest comforter! Our job never ends and I’m truly okay with
that because my superhero days are good. I love spandex! NO CAPES though!
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